Hello! Oddly enough, I found this community while searching for body modification comms. I thought that this would be a nice place for me to plop myself down at, and so I am here. It's very nice to make y'all's acquaintance!

( Questions 1-10 & a baby pic! )

I knew not going through the Terrible Twos would come back to haunt us.

Boy is just finishing first grade; we held him back a year to give him time to learn to focus a little better, and I think it was a good decision. Now, though, he has started the lying I expect from a kid, along with not listening to teachers or parent-figures. Removing privileges doesn't seem to do much, and I've only spanked him once, although that may be on the table today after a discussion on how throwing things at the teacher isn't really an acceptable way to deal with being mad because she made you give yourself a mark for not listening. 

Lines? Time out? Eight minutes time out hardly seems enough; eight days grounding punishes his mom more than it punishes him. His stock answer in discussions about why he doesn't listen is "I don't know."

Argh I say again.

I have been married to my husband for 3 years. After 3 years of battling with his ex-girlfriend and being sent to Iraq he finally has a court order to be able to see his son. I have never had any kids. I have babysat but now I am trying to figure out how to prepare my house for my stepson. My stepson is 5 years old. This is the first time we will get to bond and know each other. My husband hasn't been able to see his son since we were married due to the ex. So I am excited and ready to get to know my stepson and provide a good place for him when my husband and I get him. Do I get a toddler bed for him or do I get him a regular twin bed and put up guard rails on it? Do I get him stuff to draw us pictures? Any advice would great! I am very very new to being a stepmom of a 5 year old.

x-posted to alternparents 

Thank you everybody for your participation in our FEAR OF CHILDBIRTH SURVEY!   We are still looking for pregnant women in North America to complete a short, online survey about their preferences, concerns, fears, and expectations about childbirth.

This research is being conducted through the University of British Columbia in Vancouver, Canada.

Here is a link to the 15-minute survey: http://www.motherinfantwellness.ca/library/Fear_Of_Childbirth.pdf

For more information on the Mother-Infant Wellness Lab visit http://www.motherinfantwellness.ca/

Please message me if you have any questions or concerns. And thank you again for your participation!

** We apologize for cross-posting! We are trying to reach pregnant women in as many different communities as possible!

Our new baby showed up last week, and this week, was christened into the pack.

( Read more... )

We are a three-parent family, with two moms (who aren't involved with each other, but are with other people) and one dad (involved with both of us), and this is our first baby.

Our baby is due in a week or two.
I caught up on the blog here: http://familyvalues.dreamwidth.org/11941.html
I'm nervous and not, totally excited but somewhat mellow about it, busy and tired already, and just overwhelmingly happy. My life is really beyond my wildest dreams.

Atari (my 7 week old son) seems to have discovered the joys of sleeping through. It's still early days, but for the last couple of nights, I've put him down and he drops off around 11-11.30, then he hasn't woken for his usual night feed (used to be between 2.30 and 4am) and has been sleeping until 6-6.30am.

I hope he sticks to it. I was beginning to forget what a decent nights sleep felt like :)

Current Mood: happy

1. How old are you? 26
2. How old is/are your child/children? 7 weeks old.
3. Boy/Girl? Boy
4. Did you always want children, and were your children planned? Never thought about it until the other half mentioned it. Yes, we (kinda) planned our little boy (We had the discussion, and were sort of trying - more of a 'letting nature take its course' kinda thing. We conceived 6 weeks later)
5. Do you ever wish your experiences of parenthood were different? Sometimes I wish he'd let me sleep another hour ;)
6. What do you think your children will be like as adults/older children? I have high hopes, but ultimately he will be free to make his own choices and I shall support him in whatever he wants to do.
7. Name three things you wish for your children. Good health, happiness, and a life rich in experiences and friends.
8. Which attributes have your children taken from each parent/family member? He's definitely picked up my night owl habits and his daddies appetite :)
10. Do you want more children? Maybe one more, if you can promise me a shorter labour and less pain (23 hours, full back-labour. Man, it sucked!)

Current Mood: busy

My son(9) is giving us a lot of heartache. We moved from the US to UK. He seemed excited about it. He started a new school and started to make friends. Well, he seemed to turn and has become a serious problem child. He used to be a good student,but now he gives his teacher a lot of trouble. He used to be a respectful nice child. Now he is speaking inappropriately,kicking other kids and today he spit on a girl. I honestly almost started crying when his teacher told me he did that.  We have tried every kind of discipline(positive and negeative,bribing,etc,etc) except for sending him to military boarding school. His father has spent more time with him and making a real effort to be there. I am honestly clueless,worn out and heartbroken. Could anyone give me any ideas to turn this around. I fear he is going to get kicked out of school and become a hopeless case to his teachers.

Current Mood: stressed

1. How old are you? 34...will be 35 in September.
2. How old is/are your child/children? (for the pregnant, use the number of months/weeks left to go) 9 and about to turn 3.
3. Boy/Girl? One of each. We got a boy the first time and my girl showed up 6 years later after 2 years of trying.
4. Did you always want children, and were your children planned? I was really unsure if I wanted kids. I'm glad I did,but it is such a trail and error process for me because my mom wasn't around for much of my life.
5. Do you ever wish your experiences of parenthood were different? Why? I wish I had more support when it came to nursing. I never got to nurse my daughter and had A LOT of trouble with my son. I wish I never had PPD.
6. What do you think your children will be like as adults/older children? I am convinced my son will work for the LEGO company and my daughter is anybody's guess. She like girly things but she loves animals and mud. Maybe a farmer...or a forest ranger.
7. Name three things you wish for your children.  I hope they are happy,compassionate and loved.
8. Which attributes have your children taken from each parent/family member? My son is very nerdy like me. We love shows like Mythbusters He also loves books and surfing the net. My daughter likes the outdoors like me. My daughter looks like her dad but with a fuller face. She is also musical like her dad,but her taste are WAY different.
9. Did your experience differ from what you expected? How so? I honestly can say I thought I would be calmer. My mom and stepmom blew up at me and I can say I do they same. I am working on it.
10. Do you want more children? Nope and the baby shop is permanently closed.

I am due with my first child in a couple weeks and i'm looking into getting a video baby monitor and am looking for suggestions. I saw that this Motorola Digital Video Baby Monitor with Room Temperature Thermometer is on sale today at Amazon for $99.99 (down from $199.99). It seems to have good reviews, and all the features i'm looking for. I was just wondering if anyone has used this model before, or if you have another model to recommend to me? thanks!

1. How old are you? 22.
2. How old is/are your child/children? (for the pregnant, use the number of months/weeks left to go) I'm 34 weeks pregnant, 6 more to go.
3. Boy/Girl? Girl. Laurelai.
4. Did you always want children, and were your children planned? No. I never wanted children. She was not planned, she was the result of my ex-boyfriend & I rebounding with each other. It was a terrible two months, and it wouldn't have lasted, even if he hadn't ended up back in jail.
5. Do you ever wish your experiences of parenthood were different? Why? My father left my mother and I when I was about two years old, and then my mother died when I was eight. I was raised mostly by my alcoholic grandmother. As it turns out, my father and I are best friends today & my mother is my ideal role model as far as what a mother should be (save for the shooting heroin, you know). So, no, not really.
6. What do you think your children will be like as adults/older children? I've no idea. I know that I ended up turning out exactly like my mother, but she died early on, so it could have been some kind of subconsciously-perpetrated thing.
7. Name three things you wish for your children.
a. Courage.
b. Security.
c. Health.
8. Which attributes have your children taken from each parent/family member? She's not been born yet.
9. Did your experience differ from what you expected? How so? I didn't expect to have children. I didn't expect to keep this one. I definitely didn't expect to be as excited about it as I am, or to be as fulfilled emotionally, or to have let the experience change me in the most necessary of ways.
10. Do you want more children? Not for awhile. Not until this theoretical child has two (or three, or four) adult parents that love each other very much.

Sooooo I'm 25 (for about another month or so anyway) and a single parent to two girls ages 6 & 4. They're great. But I am a SINGLE parent with full legal and physical custody, the girls stay with their other mommy 1 night a week but other than that they're with me.

I've just finished a 10 month accelerated career college program, well almost anyway I'm doing a month long unpaid practicum that ends at Christmas and then I'll get to call myself a qualified legal secretary/paralegal.

Now this all sounds great accept, I'm bored already with the job.

And I'm seriously contemplating more education. Like maybe 5-7 years more education.

I'm thinking about law school.

I don't have an undergrad degree, so I'd need a 4 year undergraduate degree. I've looked into this a fair bit and have an idea of HOW it could be done.

I'd have to work at least 25-30 hours a week and take out (more) student loans but it's POSSIBLE.

The question:

Is it fair to my kids?

I can make *enough* money as a legal secretary to provide for my family on my own (don't get me wrong we'd still be on a tight budget and likely always would be, but we'd get by). So really I can't use the excuse of "I'm furthering my education in order to support my children".

I don't have a spouse so it's not like I could be a full time student and not work.

The thing is I can't see myself ever being intellectually satisfied at this job.

In a perfect world 25 year old me, who NOW knows this would hop in her time machine, warn the younger me about what a douchebag my exhusband would turn out to be and make sure I got the undergrad degree while we were married, or would have waited to have kids (but really that's not true because the kids are the best thing that's ever come into my life) or something.

But seeing as I DON'T HAVE A TIME MACHINE.

What would you do?

Suck it up till they're grown adults and work a decent job for decent pay when you feel like you could have done more with your life?=, then go back to school when they're grown and you're in your 40's?

Go back to school and have very little time to spend with the kids while they're growing up and wonder if that will forever screw them up?

Other?

When was the first time you took your child to a concert, and who was it/what type of music was it?

My girl is almost 4 and I feel like she'd enjoy going to a show or two with me now and then (earplugged, of course!). She's always loved my kind of music (folk-punk/some harder crust punk). The only problem I think I would have is that me and her father met a punk show, and he still remains strongly involved in the "scene", but not in her life. I know if we went to a show that he'd most likely be there. She knows who he is and I wouldn't want to upset her if he interacts with her in an odd way, but at the same time, I want to share a part of my life with her as well.

Any advice?

Okay, young master trampledamage (turns 4 in January) refuses to get his hair cut. I'm fine with that, we came to an agreement that if he wasn't going to get his hair cut he had to let me wash it (which he also hates, but not as much as the cutting!)

I'm not going to force him to get his hair cut if he doesn't want to, but now it's getting long enough that it's going to get in his eyes soon.

Since hair bands and clips and what-not aren't yet gender-neutral, I figure my best option is getting a hair gel or something that can hold his hair back.

Bear in mind, I know nothing about hair products at all!

So, can anyone recommend something that would be gentle enough for his hair, but easy to use?

thanks heaps!

1. How old are you?
47

2. How old is/are your child/children? (for the pregnant, use the number of months/weeks left to go)
Our fetus is 23 weeks old this week. There are three of us parents, two moms and a dad. I'm the not-pregnant mom.

3. Boy/Girl?
Probably a boy, he was being a bit modest.

4. Did you always want children, and were your children planned?
Yes, always. My husband and I spent a few years assumning we never would.

5. Do you ever wish your experiences of parenthood were different? Why?
I wouldn't mind if my own had been different, but I like who I am now, and I don't know how I'd be were my parenting different, so I'm okay with how things were.

6. What do you think your children will be like as adults/older children?
It'll be fun to find out.

7. Name three things you wish for your children.
I hope he can avoid most potential warehousing in his life, that he continues to love and respect and be grateful for extended family the way his parents are, and that he's not allergic to dogs.

8. Which attributes have your children taken from each parent/family member?
He's nocturnal so far -- a bit like his biological parents.

9. Did your experience differ from what you expected? How so?
I always thought I'd be the pregnant one, and then, that I'd get no kids at all.

10. Do you want more children?
We'll see -- I'll turn 50 right around when he turns 2. Ask again then. :)

I'm blogging about this whole thing, with regard to me, or less public stuff at http://mactavish.livejournal.com/tag/baby and at http://familyvalues.dreamwidth.org for more general talk.

Hey everyone.. New to this site... WOndering if it would be alright to put in a word that my partner and I are looking to adopt a little one. We are certified and have our homestudy...so talking about Alternative parenting, if you know of anyone who is looking for 2 adoptive mommies, will you drop us a line? I love all the cool ideas you have all posted.. Looks like you are all a great group :)smiles. Happy friday!

I make my own baby food and would like to serve my son carrots soon. However, I have read that carrots can be poisonous (due to nitrate content) to younger babies...particularly organic. One site said under six months, another said under three months. My son is 5 months old. Can anyone offer me more information on this topic? Has anyone here fed a baby under six months old carrots?

Current Mood: energetic

My older spawn is turning 6 next week, for her birthday she wants CD's and clothes (yes 6, not 16) I seem to have the only kids on the planet that don't like toys? Anyway she likes Tori Amos, Madonna and annoying things like crazy frog. Any music suggestions? I don't want anything with too much adult language but she's not super into kids music either. I am a pop-culture failure so I have no idea what might be a good idea for her but I personally can't stand Justin Beiber or whatshername? Hannah Montanna?

Thoughts?

Just thought i'd give fellow parents a heads up on this. Amazon is giving a free 3 month trial to all parents right now: Amazon Mom- free Amazon Prime trial

It's called Amazon Mom but it's aimed at anyone who takes care of a child. For those unfamiliar with Amazon Prime, it is a service that usually costs $79 a year that gives you free 2 day shipping and $3.99 overnight shipping.